"It seems to me I am trying to tell you a dream-making a vain attempt, because no relation of a dream can convey the dream sensation, that commingling of absurdity, surprise,, and bewilderment in a tremor of struggling revolt, that notion of being captured by the incredible which is of the very essence of dreams. No, it is impossible, it is impossible to convey the life-sensation of any given epoch of one's existence-that which makes its truth, its meaning-its subtle and penetrating essence. It is impossible. We live, as we dream-alone".
------------- Joseph Conrad in "Heart of Darkness"


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May 15, 2012

English translation of my poems

(These translations were done with help of Prof. Tom Montgomery and I am very thankful to him)
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1.   My Share of Words

In a deep cavern of oblivion
I search for my share of alphabets
As if in flicker of a firefly
someone is struggling to create Zardozi craft*
I fumble:
which one a golden string
and which is a cotton thread?
I am entangled in a silken cobweb

In somnolence I wonder through the night
And ask an ancestral mother of three million years past:
How she weaved images into speech
How often she was at a loss of expression
And how often she created new morphemes


Between dreams and wakefulness
I try to hear
syllables
I try to decipher words
I try to describe images
Pursuing glimmers in the depth of memory
Often I falter
Sometimes I take wings
And in the process I decay
Bit by bit
Day by day.
********
*Zardozi  (a very special embroidery done with gold string)

2.       Corvallis Sky in Autumn
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It’s early morning
In between the rising sun and setting moon
Chirping-trilling-honking flocks speedily go by like arrows
Astonishing the head of one below
As momentarily the sky is full of birds
The birds seems to inviting us
Lets go across these continents
Lets go across these oceans
Migration is a part of life
Not searching for a destination of a sort
But only fulfillment for an adventurous soul
Perhaps there is a thirst for unseen worlds
or hope of unforeseen possibility
This earth is still full of wonders
****

3.  Flight

At first
The wings of mind beat
And an old saying emerges
“Look up and live”
The mind first falls into deep gorges
Before it attains height
And finally comes the flight
****

4.  Looking Back

All of a sudden
A streak of bliss illuminates a dark canvas,
At the end of a narrow street
I catch a momentary glimpse of hope
Somewhere in a deep gorge
A suspension bridge swings briefly
Now and then I sniff fennel in the air
And deep in my mind Raga “Peelu” plays

A blithe eagle takes off in the wind
Gradually a partial rainbow forms
in the midst of drizzle
A little girl wishing for ripples
keeps dropping pebbles in a pond
Just now I see a fish go by

The memories come and go like a breeze
creating dunes
I randomly encounter
ephemeral tranquility
ephemeral turmoil
at odd times
in strange locales
******


5.  Motherhood
A mother weaves a face, smiles
imagining a stranger taking  shape inside her
the first petal of a lily unfurls
numerous sunflowers turn in chorus
And a monarch butterfly gently flaps her wings
A mother weaves a face, smiles
within her inner self  
A small rivulet descends the side of a cliff
and flows toward unknown destiny
At the core of her soul the bond with humanity revitalizes
And the sense of shared existence imbibes in nectar
A mother, an immigrant, dark skinned woman
An outcast from the predetermined molds
is wandering in the midst of her time and claiming space
Escaping from hatred, malice, and baseness
somewhere in the New York of  2003
Hearing FOX, BBC, CNN
Hearing Freespeech, Zinn, Azeez, Arundhati
A mother weaves a face, smiles
Routinely falters hearing a sigh of another
And slowly whispers a prayer
“May life be possible, may life be beautiful
for everyone born from a mother’s womb”
A mother weaves a face, smiles
Within the father flows an unknown spring of care and caution
And wrapped within it the expectant mother counts her days.
***

1 comment:

  1. Thank you so much Sushma for sharing these thoughts and words with me.I find them deep ,personal, profound and musical. I am grateful that you chose to share them with me.

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